For better or worse, the Tesla Diner is now open, finally bringing smash burgers to Los Angeles, a city that until now has been completely devoid of smash burgers. You'd think at least one other person somewhere in LA would have thought to open a smash burger restaurant by now, but nope. Not a single one. Thank God, our hero Elon Musk took a break from innovating robotaxis and data centers to spend a little time innovating the LA food scene.
Still, that got us thinking. Could any other automaker open a diner of its own and even come close to matching Tesla, with its longstanding reputation for delivering the highest quality product and impeccable customer service? In fact, is it possible that another automaker could even run a better diner than Tesla? To get to the bottom of it, we asked you that exact question on Friday. Now the answers are in, and it's time to take a look at some of the most popular suggestions y'all had.
I would pick Volvo. The Swedes have already incorporated diners into their non-food companies with restaurants in Ikea stores. And they've gotten good at it to the point where people go to Ikea just for the food. I think Volvo could pull off a restaurant of their own here. I'd personally love to taste some Volvo-branded meatballs.
Suggested by: Giantsgiants
I spent a fair amount of my life in a diner and the thing is you want it to be a greasy spoon where it's a bit rough and ragged, the quality doesn't have to be stellar but rather good enough to get you through the day, and you can count on a bunch of old salts there opining about the good old days when things were better.
With that said, I nominate Ford.
Suggested by: Alf Enthusiast
In heaven the cooks are French, so I vote Renault since Peugeot is owned by Stellantis. Second choice would be an Italian brand that's not under Stellantis, but that would only leave Ferrari and that'd be too expensive.
Suggested by: fabey
The immediate answer is VW based on their years of making curry wurst. Of course this makes Haus of VW more beer hall than diner
Suggested by: Slow Joe Crow
Subaru should run a diner. Organic, farm to table diner to match their outdoor marketing. Mostly good food with a few little differences that make the place odd but quaint.
Suggested by: Music Teacher 17
i think mazda would make a really convincing high end, modern, urban coffee cafe.
volvo would obviously be a high class, designer restaurant that was more experienced based, than taste.
subaru would have a more $30 cheeseburger, tin ceiling, all organic millennial joint with everything not handheld served in mason jars.
Lexus would have a very airy high end tea and dessert cafe with very classy furniture and odd hand selected menu items from all over the world.
But for good ol' 'Murican Jukebox-havin' diner with the glittery red booths and stools... Ford.
Suggested by: poot lovato
Mack Trucks.
A lot of restaurants along the interstates live and die by the word-of-mouth of truckers.
Who better to run a diner than a company that has always marketed itself to professional drivers? If your biscuits and gravy are a little sub-par one morning, half the east coast with know about it by lunch time. Adapt or die.
Suggested by: Earthbound Misfit I
Unlike usual overpromising, underdelivering to customers. Probably most reliable and durable brands will do a much more better by underpromising and overdelivering, ex : Toyota
Suggested by: Derry
Citroën obviously. So Frenchy, so chic. With their close association with Michelin (bought Citroën in 1937 after a bankruptcy), they could all have their own star!
The Michelin Guide was started to help travellers find their way and a decent meal. One star signified "a very good restaurant in its category". Two meant it was "worth a detour" and three was "worth a special journey." Encouraging people to tour and burn through some rubber on the way.
Suggested by: Déesse
Nissan
What's the best BBQ place in town? The one where the parking lot is slippery with grease and the walls are stained gray from the smoke
What's the best Taco truck in town? The one with Tires that were built in the Nixon Administration that was painted with a roller in eye searing green and orange.
What's the best steak house in town? The one with broken down pickup in the back and a random steer wandering by.
What's the best seafood place in town? The one that has a boat in the back that looks like the SS Minnow.
The Best Chinese place? They are raising chickens and ducks behind the restaurant when the health inspector isn't around.
There's a constant here. JANK. Broken down, beat up, missing paint, questionable repairs, generally a rundown, and more than a bit questionable in condition and location.
AKA Nissan
If you are in a part of town where there are half burnt out Altimas and Sentras, you are likely really close to a great place to eat already
Suggested by: hoser68
Lets see:
Ford: A solid diner that has been a local gathering place for years, but in recent years they've changed the menu, quality is worse but the meals are now huge.
Stellantis: A chain of theme restaurants. They share the same food suppliers across every restaurant so the food ends up tasting pretty much the same but they really don't want to let on that it's a chain so they dress them up wildly differently. A couple of these chain restaurants are inexplicably better than the others.
Nissan: Once a really good and popular restaurant. The quality of the food has definitely gotten worse over time. The restaurant is pretty obviously mob connected.
Honda: Good quality, standard fare diner food, but they inexplicably have a whiskey collection that would be more at home in a dedicated whiskey bar, and a bartender who makes a show about carving ice into diamond shapes
Jaguar: They were a long running bar with OK food but a clientele that leaned towards retirees. They currently are doing a complete rebrand and remodel. No one has been let in yet but they've been aggressively hyping up how cool the rebranded restaurant would be by hiring a bunch of models to do pop up street performance art events.
Suggested by: Connor Paull
