This episode of According To You was rather insightful for me, as there were many names you listed that I never even knew existed! With so many to choose from, deciding the craziest car name is rather difficult. Perhaps even impossible?
So maybe we don’t need to whittle a list down to a single crazy car name. Here’s a list of names you chose compiled by automotive brand, and feel free to tell us if you think we’ve missed something.
Garrett: I have a 1988 Oldsmobile 98 Regency Brougham. It always gets confusing to the parts guys, thinking it’s an Olds 88, or a 1998 year model, etc.
JJC: GMC Acadia Denali: How many parks do you need in a name?
AG1962: Brougham d’Elegance! Fleetwood Brougham!
ap41563: In the 1990s and 2000s, Buick had a dash plaque that displayed the model name by Buick. So I suppose I have a LE SABRE LIMITED BY BUICK Celebration Edition.
Michael A: I owned a Buick Apollo in college and always thought it was a mouthful and a crappy name. I frequently found myself explaining that “it’s just like a Nova, but it’s a Buick.” I secretly wished it was a Nova.
S Webster: A buddy in high school had a car with the longest name: Buick Opel Manta Rallye Coupe. It had those badges all across the back!
Gilbert C: 1969 Buick Electra 225 Brougham. I had one of these beasts, got 9 mpg, would pass anything but a gas station with that 420 cu-in monster.
Rider79: That should have had, at least from the factory, a 430. I also do not recall a Brougham version of the Electra in that era, although I could be wrong; I do recall a Limited.
hyperv6: Yes, it was a Limited and had a 430.
snailish: The Nissan S-Cargo, as an homage to the Citroën, is pretty out there. Ditto the Nissan Figaro.
NightRanger: Nissan Fairlady.
Timothy W: Nissan Stanza Altima, and Nissan Armada Pathfinder also come to mind.
DavidP: Ford’s Probe – always reminds me that I have an upcoming medical exam.
Desmond G: “Mustang Cobra” always seemed silly to me. So, like, a centaur with the head of a snake? That would make for an interesting giant hood decal.
Ronnie Schreiber: Nobody mentioned the Edsel? At a press event, I had a chance to ask Edsel Ford II where Henry and Clara got the name for his grandfather, and he said Henry Ford’s boyhood best friend was named Edsel.
RM: As for Edsel, remember it was to be a new marketing division of FoMoCo so there were model names. Every Edsel model name; Citation, Corsair, Pacer, Ranger, Villager & Bermuda were subsequently used on other cars.
Timothy W: How about the 1978 Ford F250 Ranger Explorer Camper Special that my parents bought brand new? Or the 1974 Ford Gran Torino Elite: When bring gran just isn’t elite enough?
But the weirdest one in my book…the Ford Tudor made a little sense, but the Fordor?
jeepcj5: Tudor pronounced “two-door” and Fordor pronounced “four-door” is sort of uninspiring, but it makes perfect sense.
DJ: I have a 1977 F-350 Ranger XLT SuperCab Camper Special. Quite a mouthful.
Mark S: Mercury Marquis de Sade. (That’s a nod to Car & Driver magazine, Brock Yates era)
Johnathan S: Mercury Marquis de Sade, of course.
Thomas M: In 1955, Ford hired a poet to suggest names, and among others, she came up with “Intelligent Whale” and “Silver Sword” but my favorite was “Utopian Turtletop.” Too bad they never made it to real cars.
DUB6: Ford actually paid someone (presumably real money) to suggest “Intelligent Whale” as a vehicle name? Seriously?
Deborah K: My nominee is the Sonett. The name is derived from the Swedish Så nätt den är, “How Neat It Is,” but it is almost invariably misspelled Sonnet, like the Shakespearian works. I owned a 1968 V4 Saab Sonett, VIN 000686, back in the day.
It was a fairly rare car even in the early ’70s, but a wonderful performer in snow and ice. I lived in St. Louis at the time, and I was told there were about 7 or 8 of them in the area, although I never saw them.
Rider79: I would nominate the Toyota “TRD” moniker that they apply freely to various models. I am not the only person whom I have heard pronounce it as “turd” – cannot imagine who approved that “TRD” name.
Greg J: I have always found the Toyota Tundra TRD a very odd choice of initials to add to the name. I know it stands for Toyota Racing Division, but I myself always see a less-than-flattering image when I see the initials TRD. It is also a bit incongruous when it is applied to a pickup truck, which is basically a utility vehicle.
Gary B: In Japan, Lexus announced a special edition of the IS 500 sedan called the Lexus IS 500 Climax Edition. No, I did not make that up.
hyperv6: The one I always found odd was the Pontiac Fiero. It was going to be a Pegasus till the name at the last second was killed. That is why it has the flying horse emblem.
Then GM claims in a late-night meeting, John Schinella looked in an Italian dictionary and found the name Fiero. That means “proud” in Italian. (Well, it kind of, sort of means that.) It makes for a dramatic story, but now here is the rest of the story. The name was also used on a Firebird Aero Concept in the late sixties by Pontiac. It was called the Firebird Fiero. Fiero was “Fi” for Firebird and “ero” for aero.
Sid B: I’ve always laughed when seeing an HHR. I work for the architecture firm founded by HH Richardson, and no self-respecting designer would be caught dead in one. Except that they’d probably make a reasonable hearse.
jeepcj5: I’ll suggest the Citation, which is something you don’t want to get while driving. But not as bad as a GM Impact.
CBCard: Chevy Nova, which roughly translates in Spanish to “doesn’t go.”
Allan W: But in Latin it means “new”.
hyperv6: And that was a myth even before the web.
TG: Nova does translate into doesn’t go (with an appropriate space), but if it ever had any impact on sales is another question!
John P: The Japanese vans have the best names. I am partial to the Suzuki Every Joy Pop Turbo. Mitsubishi probably has the craziest with names like the Delica Space Gear Super Exceed Turbodiesel.
Christopher M: Mazda Bongo Friendee?
Elisa: The Suzuki Esteem always made me laugh
DavidP: Isuzu Mysterious Utility Wizard, Mitsubishi Minica Lettuce, Daihatsu Naked—hey—this is a family publication!
DUB6: I guess I can throw in my 1980 Plymouth Champ. Fun little car, and really quite practical for my wife’s city driving, but it really never had a chance to be the “champ” of anything!
Thomas: I currently own a 2024 Dodge SRT Challenger Redeye-Jailbreak-Widebody-Hellcat.
MACE: “Last Call” (or not)?
hyperv6: Dodge La Femme.
Mags56: Desoto Firedome and Plymouth Cranbrook.
Jack: Mine worked well—but GREMLIN just sort of tells you what might be coming—no?
Brian W: Gremlin, which was put out by AMC on April Fool’s Day 1970! ??
DUB6: Gremlin (and the Subaru Brat!) always struck me as a name that didn’t really inspire love and pride-of-ownership, let alone confidence in the car.
daddy stev: VW The Thing.
Jacob G: I think of the one in that Futurama episode: ThunderCougarFalconBird! But seriously, the VW 181 “Thing.”
Cozy: Some great names from the comments. I echo VW Thing and add AMC Pacer—What did it, or what could it actually “pace?”
hyperv6: Studebaker Dictator.
Joe S: Look up the names that Apperson applied to his cars in the late aughts (prior to 1910). They don’t translate well today.
Timothy W: No one is going to mention the Renault Fuego?
studenorton: By the time you realized a Velocette Venom Thruxton KTT Clubman was gaining on you, it had passed you, and having reached the fourth phone pole, the cylinder had fired once more.
RM: Kia Niro (make sure its pronounced ‘Ny-ro’ rather than the mad Roman emperor).
hyperv6: Shelby GT 350. So he (Shelby) had his shop foreman walk from the corner of the Shelby building to the LAX property line and count out the steps. That was 347 steps. So that’s when they decided that they’d call it a GT350.
MrKnowItAll: Hands down award winner: Mohs Ostentatienne Opera Sedan. Or, on a lighter note, the Humber Super Snipe.
Mrslate: I’ve always thought the Porsche Panamera was a bad name. It makes me think of bread.
Merlen: I once owned a ’59 Lloyd Alexander TS van. It had 2-cylinders and it looked like a mini panel van.
hyperv6: La Ferrari (Enzo would never have approved that.)
Wow Sajeev, you managed to find a centerpage ad that featured the exact color scheme of the Champ we had – now that’s research for ya, folks! ?
I am not a stalker, I promise. ?
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