Alfa Romeo's latest attempt to crack the small car market comes with a shocking twist - it's electric and it'll cost you a pretty penny. But is it worth the dosh?
A Trip Down Memory Lane
Alfa Romeo has been churning out pint-sized motors for yonks. Remember the Alfasud? Of course you do, it's probably still rusting away in your gran's garage. Then there was the Mito and the Giulietta, both of which were about as Italian as a pizza from Domino's, but we loved them anyway. Now, Alfa's having another crack at the small car market with the all-electric Junior. Because nothing says "Italian passion" quite like a silent, battery-powered hatchback, right?
What's in a Name?
Originally, this little tyke was supposed to be called the Milano. But apparently, some Italian politicians got their knickers in a twist because it's actually built in Poland. Heaven forbid an Italian car be built outside of Italy! So, they settled on "Junior" instead. Probably because it's small, cute, and likely to drain your bank account faster than a real junior.
Under the Bonnet
Strip away all that Alfa Romeo styling (which, let's be honest, is the only reason anyone buys an Alfa), and what you've got is basically the same car as the Fiat 600e and Jeep Avenger. It's like Stellantis took their electric platform and played dress-up with it. But hey, at least this one's wearing a designer suit.
The base model packs a 54kWh battery powering a 154bhp motor, promising a range of up to 250 miles. That's about as far as you'd want to drive an Alfa without checking for oil leaks anyway. If you're feeling particularly flush (or foolish), there's a Veloce model with a beefier 237bhp motor. Just don't expect to go as far - range drops to around 215 miles. But who needs range when you look this good standing still?
Trim Levels: From 'Meh' to 'Mamma Mia!'
Alfa's offering three flavours of Junior, each more expensive than the last:
1. Junior Electric (£33,895)
The entry-level model comes with all the basics you'd expect: 18" alloys (because anything smaller would be embarrassing), rear parking sensors (for those who can't judge distances), LED lights (to blind oncoming traffic in style), and a 10.25" infotainment system (because who doesn't need a tablet glued to their dashboard?). Oh, and it's got a heat pump, which is handy for those three days of winter we get in the UK.
2. Junior Speciale (£35,695)
For an extra two grand, you get "sporty styling" (read: stickers), 18" Petal alloys (because flower power is back, apparently), and an electric driver's seat with massage function (for when you're stuck in traffic and need to relax). It also comes with a 180-degree camera, which is great for seeing just how close you are to scratching those fancy alloys.
3. Junior Veloce (£42,295)
If you've got money burning a hole in your pocket, the Veloce is here to help. It's got the most powerful electric motor, 25mm lower suspension (because potholes aren't a thing in the UK), and 20" alloys (say goodbye to your spine). You also get red brake callipers, because nothing says "I'm sporty" quite like coloured brake components.
The Price of Italian Flair
Now, let's address the elephant in the room - the price. Starting at £33,895 and rocketing up to £42,295 for the Veloce, this isn't exactly pocket change. For that kind of money, you could buy a decent used Giulia Quadrifoglio and have enough left over for a year's worth of petrol and therapy sessions to deal with the inevitable reliability issues.
But hey, who needs financial stability when you can have an electric Alfa Romeo, right? It's not like there are any other electric hatchbacks on the market that offer similar performance for less money. Oh wait...
The Verdict
Look, the Alfa Romeo Junior is a good-looking car. It's got that Italian flair that makes you want to dress better and start gesticulating wildly when you talk. But at these prices, you've got to really, really want an Alfa.
Is it worth it? Well, that depends on how much you value style over substance, and how comfortable you are explaining to your mates why you spent forty grand on a small electric car with an Alfa badge.
But fear not, Alfisti! If the thought of an electric Alfa makes you break out in hives, Alfa Romeo has promised that hybrid versions of the Junior are on the way. Because nothing says "cutting-edge technology" quite like hedging your bets.
The Bottom Line
The Alfa Romeo Junior goes on sale later this month (June 2024). If you've got more money than sense and a burning desire to own an electric car that'll turn heads (both in admiration and confusion), then get yourself down to an Alfa dealer pronto.
Just remember, for the price of a fully-loaded Junior Veloce, you could buy a base model BMW i4. But then you'd be driving a BMW, and where's the fun in that?
Alfa Romeo: making sensible car buying decisions difficult since 1910.